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Thereโs a fever you canโt cool with a cloth
My stomach is turning gears andย snatching every word painfully
I try to formulate
Some feelings
A thought
My language is diced and scattered
My husbandโs world lives inside my head
And I am a foreigner in my own country
My husband is in Afghanistan
I walk the pavement in my city
And handle conversations
But I exist in a place I canโt touch
And no one hears me
Iโm here
Iโll never make sense except to my husband
Who knows my fears that have me on edge
Oh Gentle night
Heโs taking off for work and we have a few moments
I love you
Sleep calm
He says before Iโm left in silence
You are my everything
22 ( which is our language, how we say goodbye and heโs coming back)
I sigh under the stars
Cool breeze
I exist here where my husband feels home
My world is in his head too
The bombs and explosions
Wonโt be his life forever
The way he cares for my heart
More than his fears
Is a place I see with my soul
22
Phoenix Lilly is a poet who was born in Oregon and recently moved to Utah a year ago to make a fresh start.ย She loves reading poetry and wants to host a radio show one day with her husband.